Thursday, July 8, 2010

to work, or not to work?

The news of having a baby has opened a great deal of questions and issues in my life. First of which is WORK... What is a mom to do? I currently work 40 hours a week. It is hard. I miss my kids. I think they sometimes miss me too, especially Drayden, for some reason we just have a special bond that way. But most of the time they are off playing with friends, or going to school, and could really care less whether I am sitting at home or at work. However, a baby... now that seems to me that is should be a different story. I have always had the privilege of staying at home with my babies. I didn't have to go to work until Chantel was almost 3. The cons of having a job are: I have to be gone alot. I have to hire someone else to raise my baby. Breast feeding will be much harder. I will miss out on so much, and I worry that I will not have the same kind of bond with this baby as I have with my other children. We would have to make alot of financial changes. We would no longer have health insurance. The Pros of having a job are: I can afford everything I need very easily. I have AMAZING health insurance for CHEAP, I get that "me" time away from the kids.I have an excellent job with paid vacations and holidays. In my mind the cons are outweighing the pros... but the insurance thing is probably the biggest reason I am having a hard time with the prospect of quitting. It was because we didn't have health insurance that I was forced to go to work in the first place. my Emergency Gall Bladder surgery, $20,000, Drayden's broken arm $7000 Drayden's teeth, $2500, various instacare visits, $1000... that adds up folks, and well collection agencies are fairly ruthless when it comes to sucking that money out of you. We are now down to about $3000 in medical debt, so we have come a long way in just a few short years, but I don't really want to go back to having no medical insurance... it is just too scary! Insurance through my husbands job would cost us $600 a month, and if I wasn't working there would be NO WAY we could afford that. I currently pay only $150 a month through my work. While it is a personal decision, I would like as many opinions as possible because I am at a total loss!!


Lorene Briscoe said...

lynnette you can always get on chip and I know that they will let you, but open enrollment I am not sure you will have to ask, also there is food stamps and heat assistance. If you apply for all of these on the internet then I am positive you will get on use the government while you can, because you will never see your social security. Ask when open enrollment is and the most I have paid so far for being on chip is 10 dollar dentist visit for Becca. Sweetie I am here for you if you need me. Let me know what you decide. Love ya tons

Brittney said...

what a tough decision... pray, pray, pray... Is there any way to go part-time like 30 hrs/week and still keep insurance? Maybe talk to your boss about possibilities? That's hard to give up insurance and do something like CHIP because it feels good to be self-reliant if you can be. It is very hard to think about being separated from a new baby though. i don't have answers, but the Lord can help you. Good luck.

Brian and Hillary said...

Lynnette.... I have to agree with your friend Brittney and then some. This situation should be between you, your heavenly father and your husband. What will be right for you will be shown to you some how. Leave it in the lord's hands. I don't think going and getting on government assistance is going to be your answer. Trust in the lord and he will find away for you to make it through. Any ways doctors and all those people like that are no good money mongers.

I have had 4 out of 5 at home with no problems. I will never ever have another baby at the hospital again unless there is some thing wrong with me or the baby. See if having the baby at home is another option for you. It is a great experience. It doesn't cost that much either. No insurance required. It is a great thing to do especially if you are healthy and don't have any health problems.

He has done it for us in many ways. We have never had medical insurance ever. We have had a few hospital stays or visits and Brian has had a lot of dental work done that cost us a lot of money. But some how we were able to pay for everything ourselves. Yes I am sure we probably did pray for help and it was shown to us and has worked.

So I wouldn't worry and stress to much about this. Take it one day at a time and something will eventually work out or whatever.

Like I said before Lynnette it should really only be between you, heavenly father and Mitch. Try it and see what happens. You may not get an answer right away but be patient.

Any ways how are you feeling? Sorry this is such along response. You may not take what I said into consideration but at least you know what I wanted to tell you on this.

Doty Family said...

I know exactly what you are going through! I can't say either way, because I've been in both situations. I worked and then I quit and it was hard, but it was worth it. But here are some thoughts on working with a baby.

I worked until J.D. was 5 and Tyson was almost 3. It's hard, it sucks, and it does get easier with time. You just have to be sure that the time you do spend with your baby is quality time! And be very comfortable with where your baby is going to be. It helps to know they are loved and safe.

Good luck! I hope you can work out something that works for you guys!

Ashley said...

Lynnette, this is sooo tough! Especially since the insurance seems to be the major issue. When Kelly had switched jobs we had to wait three months before his benefits kicked in. We bought insurance through Blue Cross Blue Shield,and it was actually pretty cheap with really good coverage. That may be one option. Keep in mind that programs like Chip and Medicaid are there when needed, and even though self-reliance is important so is following what you believe to be right, and if that is staying home to be with your baby then there is nothing worng with that. I was just talking to my sister-in-law who has worked since her baby was 6 weeks old, he is now a year. She was talking about how she enjoys having her "me" time at work, but she hates how when she gets home she feels too tired to enjoy the time she is able to spend with her son. It's a tough call, but I know you will make the right decison! Good luck!

Anonymous said...

Nettie, Whatever you decide you will make it work. I can't imagine having a family and NOT having insurance. Thats a scary thought for me, but you guys made it work before. . . If you do decide to keep working, that doesn't make you any less of a GREAT mom. Remember that your "jelly bean" chose you to be it's momma, and I am certain that it knew exactly what it was getting into, (you know Mitch being the dad and all, thats one Brave jelly bean!) you will love your "jelly" no matter what and however you choose to provide for it is your personal choice. You'll figure it all out. Love ya!

Third Times A Charm said...

AS your friends have said, pray about it. I know that when I had to work with raising Treighton that It was hard, but because it was RIGHT for us, it hasn't effected our relationship at all. He is such a momma's boy. Nobody can make the desision for you. If you are ment to stay home the insurance and finandes will work out. Heanevly Father has a way of blessing us witht he things we need.

Accalia said...

I really don't have any advice other than to pray and go to the temple, which I'm sure you are already doing. Perhaps have Brittany and Mitch fast for you (since you can't being pregnant)... What a hard decision to be faced with, especially after so recent a promotion at work! Heavenly Father sure loves to test us, doesn't He? Now you just have to figure out what path He intends for you... Have faith (even though it's hard sometimes!!) and with His help I'm sure you and Mitch will make the right decision for your family.

Cindy L. said...

Hey Lynette,
I haven't blogged in a very long time and I've missed reading about you and your family. What a dilemma. It's all too familiar. Being self employed as we have been we've never had medical insurance. Paying out of pocket hurts the bank sometimes, but not being there for my kids would've hurt even more. Somehow we've always managed to get things worked out. You're so right. It's a personal decision. Pray, fast, look at the bigger picture and get a better perspective from the Lord. It always works itself out if you're doing what the spirit guides you to do. And only you and your hubby will know what that means for your family. Good luck friend. :)